We are talking today about how self-confidence affects your business and how to build it quicker so that you can get results faster.
My name is Brandy Shaver coming to you from Utah. And I'm excited to share this topic with you because it has been something huge that has weighed in and effected me getting results in my own business!
1. What is Self-Confidence
So what is self-confidence first of all?
Well, self-confidence and how it affects your business is how you see yourself.
And when you are around a self-confident person, how do you feel? That would be the first question, right?
So first off, self confidence is built by you keeping promises to your self. Now, I know that probably maybe not the way that you thought self-confidence is.
A lot of people think self-confidence and how it affects your business, is like your ego! Basically self-confidence is how you show up to yourself. How you feel about yourself.
It has nothing to do with the outside world.
Although the outside world is probably what has created your self-confidence so far. And so I'm going to share with you a couple of things.
First off you weren't born with self doubt.
You weren't born with these, self limiting beliefs. You weren't born with all of these things that stops you from running your business or getting results in your business.
So you were born with everything being perfect.
You were perfect. Everything about your life is perfect. And what ends up happening is your experiences then affect your self confidence. Okay?
2. The Effects of Self Limiting Beliefs
And so basically your beliefs create thoughts, which then creates feelings or actions, and then that reinforces the whole entire thing.
But when you have self limiting beliefs or self doubt in your life, what ends up happening is your mind actually goes and finds like some proof that that's actually true.
Let me give you an example: I suck at working out!!
That's a self limiting belief or self doubting myself. And here's the thing about this. I actually used to work out every day. I used to be like a guru. I would work out like one, two, three hours a day.
I would watch everything that came into my mouth, all of those things. However, I decided one day that I wasn't getting the results that I wanted, because I didn't look like a superhero or like, you know, a muscle model or whatever you call them.
And so I quit working out because I had chicken legs and arms. And so my belief, my self doubt actually went and found proof that, 'Yeah Brandy, you've been wasting all of your time, working out with your flabby grandma arms', which is what my kids call them and you have chicken legs. Right. So my mind went and found belief to support that self doubt.
And that just solidified that self doubt. So now one of the things I catch myself doing, which we're going to talk about how to fix this, is I catch myself thinking, you know what? I probably should work out, but what's the point, right?
I'm already made skinny. I'm going to have chicken legs, there isn't going to be any change.
But it isn't about the change on the outside, right? It's about the change on the inside, about overall health, about mental health, about your heart health, about everything else, when you're doing those things.
And so how does this apply to your business? Well, here's the theme. You tell yourself that you built this DMO. If you haven't got a DMO, that's probably the first issue, right? But you've built this DMO and you're like, you know what? I'm going to contact five people today about my business.
I'm going to do all these things, I'm going to grow my following. I'm going to engage with my following, I'm going to promote to my following, and I'm going to enroll some of these people into my team.
And then guess what happens? Life happens, right? Like your kids need homeschooling for seven hours a day. You are tired. You got distracted in waste book land, right?
You didn't go in intentionally into social media doing what you needed to do. And so therefore your self doubt comes up again.
And it's like, you know what, maybe this isn't for me, maybe building a team, isn't my gig. Maybe I don't know what I'm doing. Maybe, you know, all of these things.
3. How to Build Your Self-Confidence
Well, here's the thing: You've got to build that self-Confidence!!
I almost could say this is probably the foundational piece of why most people fail in anything in their life. Okay.
So how to create self-confidence, to grow your business faster.
Number one, it's an internal game. Okay. It's an internal game. It's not something that is created by outside. Like we talked about, it's an internal game. Your self-confidence begins by you keeping promises to yourself. And so how does this relate to your business? So number one, keep promises to yourself.
Number two, celebrate or acknowledge these promises, that you did it. Because sometimes we don't focus in on the little things that matter.
And it's the little things every day, that's going to build your business. So for instance, let me give you an idea about how this works. So number one, one of the promises that you could keep to yourself is "I'm going to reach out to two people today and just check in on them and see if they're okay." Right?
Building relationships, growing your audience, engaging with people. Now, if you keep that promise and you've decided "I'm going to do that every day for this entire week", you keep that promise to yourself.
Then you've got to celebrate. You're like, you know what, Brandy, you did it. You followed exactly what you said you were going to do, keeping your self-confidence high, and celebrating that.
So this is basically mastering the mundane, is how I've heard this saying as well.
But what happens is sometimes as A-players, and I know that I'm talking to a lot of you right now through that little screen, is that we're like, "Oh my gosh. Well, if two is going to make a big difference in my business. I'm going to talk to 25 a day", and then guess what happens?
We don't end up getting 25 done. And then we start like dissing on ourselves. You suck Brandy. You didn't do the twenty-five. You only did two.
So how do you build self-confidence is, number one, you keep your promises beginning today and make them simple. Guys make them so that you can actually win, okay. Make them so you can actually win.
And every incremental increase in what you do is how you make that quantum leap. It doesn't start out by you saying, "Oh, I'm going to be a top earner tomorrow."
It starts out by you keeping your promises by engaging with two people a day, reaching out to two people a day, talking to two people a day about your business. Right?
All of the things, but it's little incremental things that have to happen.
4. Keeping Self-Doubt in Check!
All right. So here's another thing that ends up happening is you will have self doubt come up. You will. It's natural.
It's the way the adversary breaks down YOU from getting to your goals. Because if he can get you to doubt yourself, then it ruins the whole entire deal of you building a team, of you helping other people.
Maybe there is a Kelly waiting to join your team because she needs a way out of a abusive relationship, or whatever, right? What will end up happening is this self-doubt will come up and these are not your thoughts.
They've been planted by your outside environment since you were little. And so these self limiting beliefs will come up and what you'll do is, what I do that I want to help you do, is I instantly in my mind, I think about a red flag.
So red flag comes up, self limiting belief comes up, 'Brandy, you suck it out, there's no reason for you to even work out' which is baloney, right?
My heart needs to work out. My mental health needs help with releasing some of the stress of life. So the red flag comes up instantly.
In my mind, I had been taught by my personal coach to machete that red flag and replace it with a green one, something positive.
This is a game you can play with yourself. Especially if you're in a place where you have a lot of self limiting beliefs or a lot of self doubts that come up, this is going to take a while. It's not going to be overnight success.
I find myself, sometimes, I'll have self limiting belief and I'll be like, 'did I really just let that come into mind?' So I missed the red flag.
So know that it's always a process of personal growth. And how this affects your business, is that once you get more self-confident with who you are and what you can deliver, with how you build your team, with who you are and attract, self-confident people actually attract more people to them.
Therefore giving you the opportunity to grow your team more because more people are coming to you and they want to follow you, which is growing your audience.
They want to engage with you, which is engaging with those people. Then when you promote, they already know, like and trust you. Okay? And then when you bring them on a call or they're the right fit for your team, you're enrolling them and you're duplicating yourself in them.
So self doubt is super super important. You've got to have that self-confidence so watch that self doubt coming in! All right.
5. The Four Flawed Beliefs
So one more thing I'm gonna share with you is you want to watch out for the four flawed beliefs.
Number one, be careful to not let your self-confidence be attached to possessions.
If possessions are how you see yourself, like possessions and self-confidence, those are one thing to you, be careful because that's not true.
You are outside of your possessions. Possessions are awesome. I love great things. I love to travel. I love expensive stuff. I have very expensive taste, right. But that is not who I am. That doesn't define me.
Number two, my accomplishments are attached to my self-confidence and I fell into this gap.
So if you guys have not fallen into this gap yet, make sure you're aware of it. What ended up happening is the more success that I had. That's how I've seen my self-confidence.
If my bank account was growing, if my team was growing then I was confident, my self confidence was high. If my team was not growing, if my bank account was suffering, I was not self-confident.
So this is very important to understand that if you fall into this trap, you will continue to have to get more and more and more and more accomplishments, to feel like you are confident.
So make sure that you know where these thoughts lead.
Number three, I am what people say I am!
That's bull crap. It doesn't matter if they're good, bad, ugly! I get haters all the time, that tell me that I suck, that I'm ugly. Like all these things, right? I get people that tell me that I'm amazing.
This has nothing to do with my self-confidence. Their opinion doesn't reflect who I am. Okay. Who I am is who I am. My intentions, who I am, what I do in this world, all of those things are part of my self-confidence, not what people say I am.
Number Four is you are what you look like.
Which again, there is a lot of stereotypes out there and that is not true. It doesn't matter what size, what color, anything about you, the way you're made is perfect.
So that has nothing to do with your self confidence. Shouldn't have anything to do with your self-confidence anyway!
So those are the four beliefs. So just to wrap this up, number one, begin today by keeping your promises.
Always say what you're going to do, to yourself. Not to your upline, not to your spouse, not to your kids, to yourself. Although if you tell your spouse something, you probably should do that too, but you get what I'm saying, that's how self-confidence is built!
And then celebrate that you did that. Do the things you tell yourself you're going to do and deliver on that and acknowledge that. And that will build your self-confidence and as your self confidence grows, your business is going to grow because it's a huge part of attracting people to you online.
So I hope you got value from today. If you did, let me know! If you know somebody that needs this message, go ahead and let them know as well and smash that heart button.
So I appreciate you being here. And we'll see you next time. Brandy xx